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Tête-â- Tête : Life is a Package Deal

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Life is a Package Deal

It was dark. I stood on the brink of something indescribable. I saw my shadow getting dissolved in an impenetrable darkness. The prevailing bleakness slaughtered the very basic meaning of life from my soul. I tottered in only to find a ruthless rocky floor with piercing stones littered all over. Artistically chiselled convex stalagmites rose up from the floor to impede my path while equally magnificent stalactites tapered downwards wounding my body. The darkness was suffocating along with the dank ambience. An absolute absence of warmth prevailed in the chilling blackness. I sensed something unknown and mystical prowling in that dense darkness. As I progressed, I felt I was plummeting into the deepest abyss of melancholy. Unbeknownst of the future, I crawled ahead. In the reigning silence all I could hear was my hyperactive lungs. The echo of my footsteps kept knocking my eardrums. My heart thudded in my ears. In that numbed agony, all I could sense was the rushing of warm blood through my veins. I continued undeterred with a desire to culminate. 

And then I saw HER. 

In the frigid depths where life was almost blotted out, SHE sat slouched in a corner. Her ghostly white mottled skin was further fouled by shadowy circles around her sad eyes. 

Those eyes spun a spiel of many a sleepless night, tearful days and a shattered life. Pain intensified as I moved closer to her. Through her flaking skin and greasy hair, I found splotches of sorrow. Her malnourished body butchered all my emotions. In that sheer nothingness I found sorrow to be my new smile. She was silent but transmitted some waves of wretchedness. The more I saw her, the more I lamented. I was in a bottomless pit of despair and gloom. My soul squandered all the joy and happiness. Her tears, which were as silent as grave roll, mingled with the dampness. I felt strangulated. Impassiveness pulverized my mind. A feeling of disgust reaped in me as she expelled grief with her every breath. I saw an ugliness. The mere will of living was lost. My soul felt as if trampled by an awful weight. I wished to be somewhere else, with someone else. Amidst her firm grip of desolation, I questioned her identity. My depression deepened as SHE uttered her name as SORROW. My cobwebbed mind wished to escape from her. I asked her the address of HAPPINESS. Sorrow stretched her hand to guide me to her sister. It was another mouth in the cavern. 

The winding ivy resembled a curtain through which dappled brightness shone through. There prevailed a brightness to rival the sun itself. I witnessed the blanket of blackness getting replaced by the bursts of brightness. Warmth conquered the whole ambience. An unpretentious smile stained my lips as I discovered HER sitting on a bed of roses. She was beauty incarnate. She epitomised joy. She radiated hope. Her contagious smile washed away all my pain. I felt as if the bright star of Hope had finally reached my door after crossing several light years. It was a blissful evocation alike a rebirth. A beautiful scene kissed my eyesight and whispered some life into me. I no more felt caged. The splendour of the green ivy was heightened by the blooms. Their beauty seemed immortal with their heads bowed down due to gravity and beautiful petals curling at the edges. Butterflies; the fairies in the bug suits, fluttered up and down, flitted from flower to flower, pausing only to drink sweet nectar. I couldn’t tag these marvellous creations of GOD as insects. The vivaciously painted wings appeared like petals floating in the air. My neurons were charged with positivity as HAPPINESS smiled at me. A branch of hope beaded my soul. I had a momentary relief as I found her morphing into more rays of hope. I desperately wanted to reach her. I wished to embrace her. I desired to run away from this pitiless unbearable path of Sorrow. My feet longed to snuggle in those silky soft rose petals. My soul wished to bathe in the prevailing contentment. My body craved to go away from the stabbing sadness. 

As I hankered to abandon SORROW and greet HAPPINESS, Sorrow uttered the rancorous reality of life.

“You cannot abandon me. None could, none can and none ever will. You must traverse through my torrid path to cherish Happiness. Sorrow and Happiness are by-products of your actions. I pave your way not as an unheard silent-killer but to make you stronger instead. I get impregnated in your memoirs to make Happiness the most desirable. I wound you to label Happiness as a care giver. You can side-line me through your prudence but can never abandon me.”

Her words struck a chord in me. I realised the insignificance of Happiness in the absence of Sorrow. I could cherish happiness because every nitty-gritty of sorrow was impregnated in my mind. I apprehended my wounds to be my actual strength. I thanked Sorrow for making me appreciate true Happiness. Neither could I ignore nor could I abandon Sorrow. I bade her a transitory adieu and embraced LIFE AS A PACKAGE DEAL.

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About the Column : Nature’s serenity and splendour, its uncommunicativeness amidst this deafening world, the intricacies of human emotions that I come across, the nitty-gritty of every relationship I stumble upon and my incessant battle within to explore myself always give birth to an avalanche of thoughts in my prolific mind. Sometimes I construct a story while at times stories construct me. Each story I pen down serves as a growth hormone for my creative mind. Every creation of mine is different from the other still I leave a bit of me in them. This column "Tête-â- Tête"  unbridles my perceptions towards relations, my rendezvous with a myriad of emotions, and my encounter with life to the world.

About the Author : A microbiologist by qualification, Atrayee Bhattacharya has served as a researcher in CCMB, Hyderabad, India and an educator in a CBSE school. Presently, she is associated with a group of educators preparing students for research aptitude. She is a trained dancer, finds peace in penning down her thoughts, a good singer though not trained and wants to visit Rome someday.

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